FANDOM


Etta Mae's Lament

Etta Mae's Lament
Performer(s): Rebecca Bunch — First Appearance: ""I'm Finding My Bliss""
Written by: Rachel Bloom & Adam Schlesinger

Quote
I'm angry and pleased and a little bit diseased but you can cure my ills with a husband!
EndQuote
— Rebecca, "I'm Finding My Bliss"


"Etta Mae's Lament" is a musical performance by Rebecca Bunch. Its a song from the classic musical "Saloon Nights And Injun Fights." In it the character Rebecca portrays is a whore house madam who is willing to give up prostitution if it means finding a husband to settle down with. Its first appearance was in the Season Four episode "I'm Finding My Bliss."


The song with lyricsEdit

Etta Mae's Lament - feat

Etta Mae's Lament - feat. Rachel Bloom - "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend"

Lyrics:

Rebecca:
I'm the local lady of the evening
and though I like my men and my booze
I pray to above that I’ll find true love
but no one wants a lady who’s used!

Oh, can someone lasso me a husband?
I'm nothing without a husband!
The menfolk give me a dollar and a smile
but that don’t lead to walkin’ down the aisle!

Hey, cowboy, can you lasso me a husband?
(though my lover count is over a dozen)
Yes, the kissin’ is fun and the wine is sweet
but what Ireally want at night is to rub a farmer’s feet!

Get me off of my back
and standin’ up straight
so I can be the type of lady that you’re not ashamed to date
get me out of the cathouse
and into a kitchen
I'll wear white and pray to martyrs
I'll trade in my guns and garters

‘Cause there are only two types of women
me and virgins you commit to

Can someone lasso me a husband?
Why are you all being so stubbin’?

I'm angry and pleased
and a little bit diseased
but you can cure my ills with a husband!


Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Songs
Season 1 Songs

🎈 "West Covina"
🎈 "The Sexy Getting Ready Song"
🎈 "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Theme"
🎈 "I'm So Good At Yoga"
🎈 "Feelin' Kinda Naughty"
🎈 "Face Your Fears"
🎈 "I Have Friends"
🎈 "A Boy Band Made Up of Four Joshes"
🎈 "Settle For Me"
🎈 "Sex with a Stranger"

🎈 "I Love My Daughter"
🎈 "I'm a Good Person"
🎈 "I Give Good Parent"
🎈 "What'll It Be"
🎈 "Sexy French Depression"
🎈 "His Status is...Preferred"
🎈 "Where's the Bathroom?"
🎈 "California Christmastime"
🎈 "Women Gotta Stick Together"
🎈 "Dear Joshua Felix Chan"
🎈 "Having a Few People Over"

🎈 "Put Yourself First"
🎈 "Textmergency"
🎈 "Where Is The Rock?"
🎈 "You Stupid Bitch"
🎈 "Group Hang"
🎈 "Romantic Moments"
🎈 "Cold Showers"
🎈 "JAP Battle"
🎈 "Flooded with Justice
🎈 "Gettin' Bi"
🎈 "I'm The Villain In My Own Story"

🎈 "Dream Ghost"
🎈 "I Could If I Wanted To"
🎈 "Clean Up on Aisle 4"
🎈 "Heavy Boobs"
🎈 "I Gave You a UTI"
🎈 "Angry Mad"
🎈 "Oh My God I Think I Like You"
🎈 "After Everything I've Done For You (That You Didn't Ask For)"
🎈 "One Indescribable Instant"

Season 2 Songs

🎈 "Love Kernels"
🎈 "We Should Definitely Not Have Sex Right Now"
🎈 "Just a Girl in Love"
🎈 "Maybe This Dream"
🎈 "Greg's Drinking Song"
🎈 "Ping Pong Girl"
🎈 "The Math of Love Triangles"

🎈 "It Was a S*** Show"
🎈 "We Tapped That Ass"
🎈 "Makey Makeover"
🎈 "Thought Bubbles"
🎈 "Triceratops Ballet"
🎈 "Friendtopia"
🎈 "Stuck in the Bathroom"
🎈 "Research Me Obsessively"

🎈 "You Go First"
🎈 "So Maternal"
🎈 "Duh!"
🎈 "Who's The New Guy?"
🎈 "George's Turn"
🎈 "We'll Never Have Problems Again"
🎈 "Remember That We Suffered"

🎈 "Santa Ana Winds"
🎈 "Let's Have Intercourse"
🎈 "You’re My Best Friend (And I Know I’m Not Yours)"
🎈 "Man Nap"
🎈 "(Tell Me I'm Okay) Patrick"
🎈 "Period Sex"
🎈 "What a Rush to Be a Bride"

Season 3 Songs

🎈 "Where's Rebecca Bunch?"
🎈 "Let's Generalize About Men"
🎈 "You Do/You Don’t Want To Be Crazy"
🎈I've Got My Head In The Clouds
🎈Strip Away My Conscience

🎈 "The Buzzing From The Bathroom"
🎈 "The Moment Is Me"
🎈I Go To The Zoo
🎈 "Scary Scary Sexy Lady"
🎈 "The End of The Movie"
🎈 "Maybe She's Not Such A Heinous Bitch After All"
🎈 "I Feel Like This Isn't About Me"

🎈A Diagnosis
🎈This Is My Movement
🎈First Penis I Saw
🎈My Friend's Dad
🎈My Sperm Is Healthy
🎈George's Coffee Song
🎈Get Your Ass Out Of My House
🎈Without Love You Can Save the World

🎈Fit Hot Guys Have Problems Too
🎈Horny Angry Tango
🎈This Session Is Going to Be Different
🎈 "Buttload Of Cats"
🎈Back In Action
🎈The Miracle of Birth
🎈Nothing is Ever Anyone's Fault

Season 4 Songs

🎈 "What’s Your Story"
🎈 "No One Else Is Singing My Song"
🎈 "Maybe I'm Just Broken"
🎈 "Meet Rebecca!"
🎈 "Time To Seize The Day"
🎈 "The Cringe"
🎈 "Don't Be A Lawyer"
🎈 "Our Twisted Fate"
🎈 "I Want To Be A Child Star"
🎈 "I've Always Never Believed In You"

🎈 "The Group Mind Has Decided You're In Love"
🎈 "Trapped In A Car With Someone You Don't Want To Be Trapped In A Car With"
🎈 "Farewell, Fair Mustache"
🎈 "How To Clean Up"
🎈 "Forget It"
🎈 "If You Ever Need A Favor In Fifty Years"
🎈 "Hello, Nice To Meet You"
🎈 "What U Missed While U Were Popular"

🎈 "Hungry Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Itchy Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Funky Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Elated Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Nostalgia Cat song"
🎈 "Sports Analogies"
🎈 "Gratuitous Karaoke Moment"
🎈 "I Hate Everything But You"
🎈 "I'm Not Sad You're Sad"
🎈 "The Darkness"
🎈 "Anti-Depressants Are So Not A Big Deal"

🎈 "Real Life Fighting is Akward"
🎈 "Etta Mae's Lament"
🎈 "The Tick Tock Clock"
🎈 "I'm the Bride of the Pirate King"
🎈 "Apple Man"
🎈 "The Math of Love Quadrangles
🎈 "Slow Motion
🎈 "Love's Not A Game"
🎈 "There's No Bathroom"
🎈 "Eleven O'Clock"

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Reprises

🎈 "West Covina (I)"
🎈 "West Covina (II)"
🎈 "Settle For Me (I)"
🎈 "Settle For Me (II)"
🎈 "I'm a Good Person (silent)"
🎈 "The Sexy Gonna Do It Song"
🎈 "Trent Is Getting Ready Song"

🎈 "I Have Friends (reprise)"
🎈 "Flooded with Justice (reprise)
🎈 "I Could If I Wanted To (reprise)"
🎈 "Thought Bubbles (reprise)"
🎈 "The Math of Love Triangles (reprise)"
🎈 "Rebecca's Reprise"

🎈"After Everything You Made Me Do (That You Didn’t Ask For)"
🎈"He's The New Guy"
🎈"Face Your Fears (reprise)"
🎈"I'm Just A Boy In Love"
🎈 "One Indescribable Instant (reprise)"
🎈 "Hello, Nice To Meet You (reprise)"

🎈 "Hello, Nice To Meet You (reprise 2)"
🎈 "End of the Movie (reprise)"
🎈"What'll It Be (reprise)"
🎈"Slow Motion (reprise)"
🎈 "JAP Battle (reprise)"
🎈"Love's Not A Game (Reprise)"
🎈"West Covina (Final Reprise)"

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Album Bonus tracks

🎈 "Sex Toys"

🎈 "It's Not Difficult To Define Miss Douche"

🎈 "Santa Ana Winds 6 A.M." (Demo)

🎈 "I'm Just A Girl In Love" (featuring Adam Schlesinger)

🎈 "Settle For Her"
🎈 I'm So Happy 4 U

CharactersEpisodesLocationsCast
Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.