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Love Triangles

The Math of Love Triangles
Performer(s): Rebecca Bunch and Math Professors — First Appearance: "All Signs Point to Josh...Or is it Josh's Friend?"

Quote
So professors...teach me the math of Love Triangles!
EndQuote
— Rebbeca Bunch


The Math of Love Triangles is a musical performance by Rebecca Bunch in which she tries to use math to resolve the love triangle between herself, Josh and Greg. In the song, math professors try to help Rebecca in this endeavor. The song first debuted in the Season Two episode "All Signs Point to Josh...Or is it Josh's Friend?". It is track number 8 on the Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: Original Television Soundtrack (Season 2).


Song and lyricsEdit

The Math of Love Triangles - feat

The Math of Love Triangles - feat. Rachel Bloom - "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend"

Lyrics:

Rebecca:
What's a girl to do
when she's stuck between men?
It's like she's a Barbie
with two perfect Ken's!

But wait!
It just occured to me!
Maybe I can solve this
with Geometry!

Yes smarts can help this
situation untangle!
So professors...
teach me the math of
Love Triangles!

Yay! Time for book facts!

Professors:
A triangle is a polygon
with three edges and
three vertices!
Take the base
times the height,
cut that in half,
you'll find the area
of the surfaces!

Rebecca:
Uh huh, I wasn't really listening
but I can see...
the center of the triangle
is little ole me!

The math of love triangles
isn't hard to learn.

Professors:
You're not taking in
what we're saying!
We're a little but concerned!

Rebecca:
Yes the math of love triangles
is as simple as can be!
Whichever Tom or Dick
I might pick
the center of the triangle
is little ole me!

Professors:
Actually a triangle
has multiple centers!

This triangle is scalene.

Rebecca:
That's astute!
So I need to decide
which man's more acute!

Professors:
Here's Pythagoras's theorem!

Rebecca:
Will this help me choose?
If not I'll be swinging
from a Hypotenuse!

Professors:
Let's take a look at what
this line bisects!

Rebecca:
Is that spelled
B-I-S-E-X?

Professors:
Those are good puns but
please pay attention!

Rebecca:
On no professors!
Am I facing suspension?
Wee! A swing!
It's literal suspension!
The math of love triangles
isn't hard to learn.

Professors:
We're starting to suspect
You don't sincerely want
to know about triangles!

Rebecca:
Yes, the math of love triangles
is as simple as can be!
I need to choose between men
but until then...
the center of the triangle
is little ole me!

Rebecca:
Is this a triangle?

Professors:
No, that's a shoe.

Is this a triangle?

Professors:
No that's you.

Rebecca:
So I'm a triangle?

Professors:
What?! No!

Rebecca:
1, 2, 3, 6, 8, 3
Go!

Professor:
You don't seem to know how to count.

Professor:
We're sincerely worried about you.

Rebecca:
Catch me!

Professor:
You're ruining the number!

Professor:
This angles right.

Rebecca:
Which angles right?

Professor:
No not right like correct.

Rebecca:
Ooh, are you erect?

Professor:
No, 90 degrees.

Rebecca:
That's really erect!

Rebecca:
The math of love triangles
is super duper fun!

Professor:
We're tired of all your tangents,
That's also a triangle pun!

Rebecca:
Oh, thanks for teaching me man math.
You all deserve a kiss!

Professor:
Lady we're all gay
we get nothing out of this!

Rebecca:
Neither man will notice
my learning disability!
Cause the center of the triangle
is little ole
sexy, little baby
Me-e-e-e-e-e-e!


NotesEdit

HomageEdit

"The Math of Love Triangles" is an homage to the classic Marilyn Monroe performance "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend". The musical sequence has been referenced in various media, most notably the 1984 Madonna video "Material Girl".
Marilyn Monroe- Diamonds are a girl's best friend

Marilyn Monroe- Diamonds are a girl's best friend



Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Songs
Season 1 Songs

🎈 "West Covina"
🎈 "The Sexy Getting Ready Song"
🎈 "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Theme"
🎈 "I'm So Good At Yoga"
🎈 "Feelin' Kinda Naughty"
🎈 "Face Your Fears"
🎈 "I Have Friends"
🎈 "A Boy Band Made Up of Four Joshes"
🎈 "Settle For Me"
🎈 "Sex with a Stranger"

🎈 "I Love My Daughter"
🎈 "I'm a Good Person"
🎈 "I Give Good Parent"
🎈 "What'll It Be"
🎈 "Sexy French Depression"
🎈 "His Status is...Preferred"
🎈 "Where's the Bathroom?"
🎈 "California Christmastime"
🎈 "Women Gotta Stick Together"
🎈 "Dear Joshua Felix Chan"
🎈 "Having a Few People Over"

🎈 "Put Yourself First"
🎈 "Textmergency"
🎈 "Where Is The Rock?"
🎈 "You Stupid Bitch"
🎈 "Group Hang"
🎈 "Romantic Moments"
🎈 "Cold Showers"
🎈 "JAP Battle"
🎈 "Flooded with Justice
🎈 "Gettin' Bi"
🎈 "I'm The Villain In My Own Story"

🎈 "Dream Ghost"
🎈 "I Could If I Wanted To"
🎈 "Clean Up on Aisle 4"
🎈 "Heavy Boobs"
🎈 "I Gave You a UTI"
🎈 "Angry Mad"
🎈 "Oh My God I Think I Like You"
🎈 "After Everything I've Done For You (That You Didn't Ask For)"
🎈 "One Indescribable Instant"

Season 2 Songs

🎈 "Love Kernels"
🎈 "We Should Definitely Not Have Sex Right Now"
🎈 "Just a Girl in Love"
🎈 "Maybe This Dream"
🎈 "Greg's Drinking Song"
🎈 "Ping Pong Girl"
🎈 "The Math of Love Triangles"

🎈 "It Was a S*** Show"
🎈 "We Tapped That Ass"
🎈 "Makey Makeover"
🎈 "Thought Bubbles"
🎈 "Triceratops Ballet"
🎈 "Friendtopia"
🎈 "Stuck in the Bathroom"
🎈 "Research Me Obsessively"

🎈 "You Go First"
🎈 "So Maternal"
🎈 "Duh!"
🎈 "Who's The New Guy?"
🎈 "George's Turn"
🎈 "We'll Never Have Problems Again"
🎈 "Remember That We Suffered"

🎈 "Santa Ana Winds"
🎈 "Let's Have Intercourse"
🎈 "You’re My Best Friend (And I Know I’m Not Yours)"
🎈 "Man Nap"
🎈 "(Tell Me I'm Okay) Patrick"
🎈 "Period Sex"
🎈 "What a Rush to Be a Bride"

Season 3 Songs

🎈 "Where's Rebecca Bunch?"
🎈 "Let's Generalize About Men"
🎈 "You Do/You Don’t Want To Be Crazy"
🎈 β€œI've Got My Head In The Clouds”
🎈 β€œStrip Away My Conscience”

🎈 "The Buzzing From The Bathroom"
🎈 "The Moment Is Me"
🎈 β€œI Go To The Zoo”
🎈 "Scary Scary Sexy Lady"
🎈 "The End of The Movie"
🎈 "Maybe She's Not Such A Heinous Bitch After All"
🎈 "I Feel Like This Isn't About Me"

🎈 β€œA Diagnosis”
🎈 β€œThis Is My Movement”
🎈 β€œFirst Penis I Saw”
🎈 β€œMy Friend's Dad”
🎈 β€œMy Sperm Is Healthy”
🎈 β€œGeorge's Coffee Song”
🎈 β€œGet Your Ass Out Of My House”
🎈 β€œWithout Love You Can Save the World”

🎈 β€œFit Hot Guys Have Problems Too”
🎈 β€œHorny Angry Tango”
🎈 β€œThis Session Is Going to Be Different”
🎈 "Buttload Of Cats"
🎈 β€œBack In Action”
🎈 β€œThe Miracle of Birth”
🎈 β€œNothing is Ever Anyone's Fault”

Season 4 Songs

🎈 "What’s Your Story"
🎈 "No One Else Is Singing My Song"
🎈 "Maybe I'm Just Broken"
🎈 "Meet Rebecca!"
🎈 "Time To Seize The Day"
🎈 "The Cringe"
🎈 "Don't Be A Lawyer"
🎈 "Our Twisted Fate"
🎈 "I Want To Be A Child Star"
🎈 "I've Always Never Believed In You"

🎈 "The Group Mind Has Decided You're In Love"
🎈 "Trapped In A Car With Someone You Don't Want To Be Trapped In A Car With"
🎈 "Farewell, Fair Mustache"
🎈 "How To Clean Up"
🎈 "Forget It"
🎈 "If You Ever Need A Favor In Fifty Years"
🎈 "Hello, Nice To Meet You"
🎈 "What U Missed While U Were Popular"

🎈 "Hungry Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Itchy Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Funky Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Elated Vagina Metaphor"
🎈 "Nostalgia Cat song"
🎈 "Sports Analogies"
🎈 "Gratuitous Karaoke Moment"
🎈 "I Hate Everything But You"
🎈 "I'm Not Sad You're Sad"
🎈 "The Darkness"
🎈 "Anti-Depressants Are So Not A Big Deal"

🎈 "Real Life Fighting is Akward"
🎈 "Etta Mae's Lament"
🎈 "The Tick Tock Clock"
🎈 "I'm the Bride of the Pirate King"
🎈 "Apple Man"
🎈 "The Math of Love Quadrangles
🎈 "Slow Motion
🎈 "Love's Not A Game"
🎈 "There's No Bathroom"
🎈 "Eleven O'Clock"

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Reprises

🎈 "West Covina (I)"
🎈 "West Covina (II)"
🎈 "Settle For Me (I)"
🎈 "Settle For Me (II)"
🎈 "I'm a Good Person (silent)"
🎈 "The Sexy Gonna Do It Song"
🎈 "Trent Is Getting Ready Song"

🎈 "I Have Friends (reprise)"
🎈 "Flooded with Justice (reprise)
🎈 "I Could If I Wanted To (reprise)"
🎈 "Thought Bubbles (reprise)"
🎈 "The Math of Love Triangles (reprise)"
🎈 "Rebecca's Reprise"

🎈"After Everything You Made Me Do (That You Didn’t Ask For)"
🎈"He's The New Guy"
🎈"Face Your Fears (reprise)"
🎈"I'm Just A Boy In Love"
🎈 "One Indescribable Instant (reprise)"
🎈 "Hello, Nice To Meet You (reprise)"

🎈 "Hello, Nice To Meet You (reprise 2)"
🎈 "End of the Movie (reprise)"
🎈"What'll It Be (reprise)"
🎈"Slow Motion (reprise)"
🎈 "JAP Battle (reprise)"
🎈"Love's Not A Game (Reprise)"
🎈"West Covina (Final Reprise)"

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Album Bonus tracks

🎈 "Sex Toys"

🎈 "It's Not Difficult To Define Miss Douche"

🎈 "Santa Ana Winds 6 A.M." (Demo)

🎈 "I'm Just A Girl In Love" (featuring Adam Schlesinger)

🎈 "Settle For Her"
🎈 I'm So Happy 4 U

Characters β€’ Episodes β€’ Locations β€’ Cast
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